TTTTT H H EEEEE
T H H E
T HHHHH EEEEE
T H H E
T H H EEEEE
PPPP OOOO RRRR TTTTT L A N N DDDD I A N N TM
P P O O R R T L A A NN N D D I A A NN N
PPPP O O RRRR T L AAAAA N N N D D I AAAAA N N N
P O O R R T L A A N NN D D I A A N NN
P OOOO R R T LLLLL A A N N DDDD I A A N N
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The Portlandian, the Internet's premier source of Tonya News
August 19, 1999 Edition
(C) 1999 Portland Ice Skating Society
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190
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Last month's issue caused quite a stir, even more so than the one
several months ago when we reported on Joe Haran's speech to the
Portland Humanist association. But then, stirring goes with the
territory when you're a Tonya supporter.
NEW TONYA WEB SITE SKATES ONTO THE SCENE
The demise of the official Tonya web site last month left a bit
of a hole in the Tonya web scene. Fortunately it has been quickly
filled by one that is far superior: "Blades of Gold", located at
http://members.tripod.com/tmhfan/index.html
is run by Kim White and Stacey Howe. Kim was an original fan club
member back in 1994 and has met Tonya in person three times -
which in other words means she's a staunch Tonyaphile in for the
long haul, unlike a certain porn merchant in Portland. It's good
to see a site run by someone who has actually met Tonya and who
can give a personal perspective. It also features some short
clips from some of the songs written by Greg & Linda Lewis for
Tonya that you can download and listen to, plus a couple of
pictures that have probably not been seen anywhere else. We
welcome Kim and Stacey to the on-line Tonya community and wish
them all the best in their attempts to develop their site.
NORWEGIAN COMMUNITY SERVICE GROUP HONORS TONYA
Some months ago we reported on an outfit in Norway called
"Eventyrplassen Vannførelag" and how they had elected Tonya as
patron of their organization. Unfortunately, for non-Norwegian
speakers it was rather hard to figure out what their site was
about. Now they've published a letter - in English - that removes
the mystery. You can read it at:
http://home.c2i.net/yoshi/vannf/brev.htm
Their name literally stands for "Adventure Square Water Supply
Team" (it apparently makes more sense in its Norwegian
equivalent) and they're a community service group in Oslo that
organizes events for their neighborhood, including barbeques,
singing, a banquet and games for the local children. The
highlight is in winter when they turn on the firehoses and turn
the square into an ice rink.
It's refreshing to see that in today's overworked and stressed-
out times such concern for the local community still exists in
some places. And it's further proof that in spite of recent
events there are many decent, honest Tonya supporters out there,
and that the John Hinkley-type whacked-out weirdoes are only a
tiny minority.
LEAVE A MESSAGE FOR TONYA
The collapse of the Maxey web site has had several consequences:
Firstly we have been informed that Tonya has decided not to have
any type of official site at present. And secondly, it raises the
question of where to leave messages for Tonya.
Fortunately the Special Duties Section has been hard at work
coming up with a solution. We've constructed our own message
board where you can leave messages instead, and these will be
passed on to Tonya at regular intervals. We've already put up
some of the ones we've collected over the past few months. And
just so that nobody can say it's just a load of Tonyaphile
propaganda we'll even allow consider anti-Tonya messages for
publication provided they're reasonably intelligent and not just
crude or abusive.
Several of the other sites listed at the bottom of this issue
also have places to leave messages as well, and we know Tonya is
aware of these.
1994: A SKATE ODDITY
During our time on the Net we've come across some pretty strange
items inspired by the infamous 1994 knee-clubbing incident,
ranging from fake stamps to tee-shirts. But without doubt the
weirdest Tonya-Nancy collectable we've ever seen was featured on
E-bay recently. These two carvings by artist Denzil Goodpaster
were recently auctioned and can be viewed at our site.
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190/carvings.jpg
The highest bid when we looked a few hours before closing was
around $21, but it had failed to reach reserve. Which means it
may well come up for sale a second time if anyone wants to own
this unique memento of one of the key moments of skating
history.
NEW SOURCE FOR SKATING VIDEOS
One of the chief bugbears for Tonyaphiles outside of North
America is the annoying differences in TV technical standards
throughout the world and the problems that can cause when playing
videotapes from other countries. This is particularly so for fans
in places like Europe or the South Pacific where the German PAL
TV system is used instead of the U.S. NTSC system that
unfortunately most Tonya tapes are recorded in. The results are
conversion hassles or the costs of shelling out for a new VCR.
Thankfully, a solution has now materialized:
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Rink/1506/tapetrading.html
is a skate tape trading site specifically dedicated to trading
tapes recorded in the PAL system. Already there's a handful of
Tonya recordings listed, including some from Lillehammer, so if
you've got some PAL skating tapes to trade, check it out.
And in case you're wondering, "Tonya and Jeff's Wedding Night" is
NOT included in the list...
PORTLAND'S PATHETIC PORNMEISTER STRIKES BACK
In our last issue we reported how "Roy Edwards", the guy who ran
the now defunct official Tonya site, was in fact really Jim
Maxey, one of America's most notorious cyberporn dealers.
It goes without saying that Maxey hasn't been too pleased with us
shattering the carefully constructed facade of respectability
he's been hiding behind all these months. He's obviously really
spewing over the fact that a bunch of people from some obscure
country he's probably never even heard of have managed to blow
the lid off his sleazy little operation. But hey, that's the
Internet - location doesn't matter any more.
Naturally, he's hit back, this time under his new alias of "Brian
Bayard", posting lies and pornography about Tonya and ourselves.
In his latest feeble effort he's reposted the Wedding Night
shots, and two new photos that he claims are of Terry Hall, one
of which is quite obscene. Although disappointing, this is hardly
surprising; Maxey is after all just a one trick pony and it's
obvious that posting dirty pictures is all he's good at. In fact,
I'll bet that the real reason he canned the Tonya site was
because he couldn't cut it running a proper straight site and had
to go back to porn, the same as he failed at running an astronomy
bulletin board and had to turn to porn to make a profit back in
the '80's.
While as we have no intention getting into a battle of wits with
an unarmed opponent, there are a number of things we do need to
clarify. Firstly, "Brian Bayard" claims he doesn't know "Roy
Edwards" and has never heard of Jim Maxey, yet he seems to be
awfully upset by our comments about them in our last issue. A bit
odd that "Brian" should be so passionate about comments made
about a couple of complete strangers. Maybe that's because there
is no "Brian" at all...
"Brian" also claims that this is all part of some conspiracy to
obtain the domain name, because we have none of our own. But he
also claims that Terry is the same person as David House, someone
who quite clearly DOES own a domain name (two of them, in fact).
Can't you even get your own loony theories straight, Jim?
Thirdly, Greg and Linda Lewis certainly don't sponge off Tonya.
In fact, they run their own very successful music publishing and
recording business. You can see for yourself at:
http://members.aol.com/nodnarbpub/index.html
Unlike Jim Maxey, the Lewises CAN run a real website and make a
living selling something honest. And they've been a great help to
Tonya and have stood by her since the days of Elaine Stamm's
original fan club way back before the Whacking. That's more than
Maxey, who threw childish tantrums and threatened to shut down
his web site every time Tonya didn't kiss his ass.
Finally, the two photos he claims are of "Terry" aren't even of
the same guy! This is clearly the work of someone a few beers
short of a six pack.
Well, we've got some photos of our own to show you. Don't worry,
these are quite G-rated. Unlike Jim "Boogie Nights" Maxey, we
don't have to resort to filth to win an argument. The first is a
photo of the real Terry Hall, the one who operates the Special
Duties Section here at PortIce. It's at:
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190/terry.jpg
Our apologies for the poor quality, but Terry doesn't like having
his picture taken so this was the only one we could find. As you
can see he's a pretty bad looking mother, so I really don't think
that it would be wise to mess with him, if you get my meaning.
The second is a photo of Jim Maxey. And the third is one of the
guy who calls himself "Roy Edwards". If you draw a moustache on
"Roy", the resemblance to "Jim" is startling...
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190/maxey.htm
By the way, we wonder if Jim is still driving a Lexus? Or perhaps
he's taken our suggestion and bought himself a REAL American
pimpmobile like a Caddy or a Lincoln Town Car instead of a
Japanese imitation.
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VISIT THESE GREAT TONYA WEB SITES:
PortIce - http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190
Dave House - http://www.davidhouse.com/tonya/index.html
Charlie Main - http://www.charliesweb.com/tonya/tonya.html
Puppetboy - http://www.puppetland.com/mirrortony2.html
Valerie Smith - http://www.olywa.net/radu/valerie/LilHam.html
Swan Lake - http://members.tripod.com/~TonyaHarding/index.html
Blades of Gold - http://members.tripod.com/tmhfan/index.html
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