TTTTT H H EEEEE
T H H E
T HHHHH EEEEE
T H H E
T H H EEEEE
PPPP OOOO RRRR TTTTT L A N N DDDD I A N N TM
P P O O R R T L A A NN N D D I A A NN N
PPPP O O RRRR T L AAAAA N N N D D I AAAAA N N N
P O O R R T L A A N NN D D I A A N NN
P OOOO R R T LLLLL A A N N DDDD I A A N N
The Portlandian, the Internet's premier source of Tonya News
February 25, 2014 Edition - SPECIAL TONYA QUIZ EDITION
(C) 2014 Portland Ice Skating Society
Today marks the final major milestone in the 20th Anniversary of
Skategate - Tonya's disastrous Long Program at the Lillehammer
Games, best remembered for the "broken shoelace" incident. It's
obviously not something we want to dwell on, so here's the
answers to our 20th Anniversary Tonya Quiz instead. See how
much Tonya trivia you know.
SPECIAL DUTIES SECTION TONYA QUIZ - ANSWERS
1) What was the name of the documentary on Tonya directed by
Sandra Luckow in 1986?
a) Sharp Edges
b) Breaking The Ice
c) The Price of Gold
d) Tonya & Jeff's Wedding Night
Answer: a). This documentary contains some of the earliest
footage of Tonya in action, including probably the only images of
her doing the now-defunct compulsory figures.
2) Which controversial American figure skater once performed to a
track entitled "People Are Still Having Sex"?
a) Nicole Bobek
b) Christopher Bowman
c) Tonya Harding
d) Johnny Weir
Answer: c). It's easy to imagine any of these skaters performing
to this song, but it is of course our Tonya, who used it for her
short program in her 1991/92 season.
3) Tonya is the first American woman to perform which skating
move in competition?
a) triple Axel
b) quadruple Gillooly
d) iron lotus
Answer: a), which anybody with any pretense of being a Tonyaphile
would know. The quad Gillooly doesn't exist (just one Gillooly
was one too many) and although there's probabably been camel-toes
in skating I'm sure they predate Tonya. As for the iron lotus:
4) Which of the following movies did Tonya NOT skate to music
b) Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves
c) Much Ado About Nothing
d) Dances With Wolves
Answer: d). Tonya skated to music from all the others, including
Kevin Costner's "Robin Hood" - but as far as we can tell, never
Costner's "Dances With Wolves".
5) The official fan magazine of Elaine Stamm's Tonya Harding Fan
Club was known as what?
a) Blades on Ice
b) The Skater
c) The Portlandian
d) The Oregonian
Answer: b). This vigorously pro-Tonya publication lasted for
around 18 months and always advocated on her behalf against a
hostile skating establishment. You can find some issues on our
site at www.pdxiss.org/skater.htm.
6) What happened to Tonya at the 1993 Pacific Northwest
a) her dress came undone
b) her skate blade came loose
c) her shoelace broke
d) she received a death threat
Answer: d). The full story of how Tonya courageously coped with
this is told in the November 1993 edition of The Skater, which
can be found at the URL above.
7) What was the name of the "security company" that Shawn Eckardt
ran out of his parents' house in Portland?
a) National Security Agency
b) World Bodyguard Service
c) Central Ice-skating Agency
d) International Skating Union
Answer: b). However the only "bodyguard" work he ever did was
accompanying Tonya through a throng of reporters at the airport
when she returned home. The NSA are the people who rummage
through your e-mails, the ISU is the outfit that runs corrupt
8) What was the weapon used to whack Nancy Kerrigan?
a) lead pipe
c) collapsible baton
d) tire iron
Answer: c). Contrary to the initial erroneous reports of
witnesses (which endure today), the weapon was not a crowbar or
tire iron but an ASP collapsible police baton purchased from a
security store in Phoenix. It is rumored that it was later
destroyed by the FBI once it was no longer needed as evidence.
9) What did Nancy say right after she was clubbed?
a) Why? Why?
b) Why Me?
d) This is so dumb & corny
Answer: a). The Intersport footage only shows Nancy saying "Why?
Why?". The misquote "Why Me" - often cited as an example of
Nancy's "whinyness" - surfaced the following day on the cover of
the New York Daily News and later Sports Illustrated.
10) Which of the following was NOT one of Nancy's sponsors?
c) Campbell's soup
d) Mane & Tail shampoo
Answer: d). Okay. We admit it. This is nothing to do with Tonya,
it was a just a cheap excuse to get a horse joke in about Nancy.
11) Portland journalists Abby Haight & Julie Vader wrote a
quickie book about Tonya entitled what?
a) Fire On Ice
b) Thin Ice
c) Tonya & Nancy - The Inside Story
d) A Good Whack
Answer: a). The book was written in about five days and published
in early February 1994.
12) An incriminating note, allegedly in Tonya's handwriting, was
found in a dumpster outside which location?
a) The Clackamas Town Center mall
b) The Dockside Saloon
c) The Lillehammer Skating Hall
d) Morry Stillwell's house
Answer: b), though the note actually contains handwriting from
three people: Tonya, Jeff & an unknown third person. Tonya says
that the only bit in her writing is Diane Rawlinson's phone
number, not the parts relating to Nancy's practice rink.
13) A skater at the Sochi Olympics recently performed to music
from the film "Schindler's List". Tonya skated to the theme from
which other Steven Spielberg film at the 1994 Olympics?
b) Jurassic Park
c) Raiders of The Lost Ark
d) E.T. The Extraterrestrial
Answer: b) - Tonya used this for her ill-fated Long Program in
14) In which position did Tonya finish after the Long Program at
Answer: d). Despite the problems with her shoelace, Tonya
actually improved two places on her Short Program result to
finish in 8th place.
15) In the wake of the Whacking, what did Shawn Eckardt later
change his name to?
a) Jeff Stone
b) Brian Griffith
c) Derrick Smith
d) Shawn Gillooly
Answer: b). Eckardt changed his name to Brian Sean Griffith. In
2004 a reporter from Willamette Week discovered him running a
computer company in a run-down area of Portland but was unable to
gain an interview. He died in 2007.
16) What was the name of the low-budget action movie which Tonya
had a part in shortly after she returned from Norway?
b) The Prize Fighter
c) Anything To Win
d) The Spy Who Whacked Me
Answer: a). Tonya plays a waitress who finds a stash of mob money
stolen by her two-timing boyfriend's other girlfriend. Although
only on screen for about 10 minutes in total, she does have a
hilarious scene where she beats up a hoodlum & kicks him down
some stairs. The film does not appear to have been re-issued on
DVD in English, so you're probably going to have to dust off the
VHS player to look at it.
17) Who was the wrestler that Tonya acted as "celebrity manager"
for in 1994?
a) The Undertaker
b) The American Love Machine
c) Ravishing Rick Rude
d) Jake The Snake Roberts
Answer: b). Contrary to some reports, Tonya has never wrestled.
She did, however, have a one-off appearance playing the "Manager"
of Art Barr, also known as "The American Love Machine".
18) What was the name of the band that Tonya formed for a one-off
charity gig in Portland in 1995?
a) The Golden Blades
b) The Triple Axels
c) The Silver Skates
d) Tonya & The Gilloolys
Answer: a). Named after her lucky gold skate blades, Tonya formed
this band for a one-off performance in Portland for Jerry Lewis'
charity - a fact conveniently overlooked by the media. It was not
an attempt at a pop singing career. Tonya was booed & pelted with
plastic bottles, though whether this was a protest against Tonya
herself or just her singing ability isn't clear.
19) In late 1995, Tonya married briefly for a second time. What
was her new husband's name?
a) Darren Silver
b) Doug Lemon
c) Michael Smith
d) Christopher Nolan
Answer: c). Tonya's marriage to mechanic Michael Smith lasted
exactly 100 days. The fact he had no idea who Tonya was when he
met her should have been a big tipoff he wasn't the sharpest
knife in the drawer.
20) Tonya skated during a break in a hockey game in which
American city in 1997?
a) Minneapolis, MN.
b) Reno, NV.
c) Detroit, MI.
d) Charlotte, NC.
Answer: b). Tonya skated during the interval in a hockey match in
Reno in early 1997. It was the only gig that her "agent" David
Hans Schmidt could get her thanks to her blacklisting by the
21) Tonya made her pro debut at an ESPN competition held in which
city in 1999?
a) Portland, OR.
b) Phoenix, AZ.
c) Huntington, WV.
d) Charleston, SC.
Answer: c). Tonya made her pro debut at this competition in
Huntington WV in October 1999 where she was welcomed back by
other skaters such as Liz Manley & eventually placed second.
22) Who was Tonya's opponent on "Fox Celebrity Boxing" in 2002?
a) Darva Conger
b) Amy Fisher
c) Paula Jones
d) Danny Bonaduce
Answer: c). Tonya was supposed to fight Amy Fisher, but Fisher
withdrew & was replaced with Paula Jones at the last minute. The
others all participated in the two celeb boxing specials, along
with Fisher's lover Joey Buttafuoco, but none fought against
Tonya. Tonya did subsequently appear on TruTV's "World's Dumbest"
series with Bonaduce.
23) Tonya's former agent David Hans Schmidt was arrested in 2007
after trying to blackmail which movie star?
a) Tom Cruise
b) Sylvester Stallone
c) Bruce Willis
d) Arnold Schwarzenegger
Answer: a). Schmidt, who had gained a reputation as the go-to guy
for people with sleazy photos of celebrities, tried to sell
Cruise photos of the actor's wedding that he had obtained from a
data recovery expert. He later committed suicide.
24) In addition to her skating achievements, Tonya also holds a
world record in which other sporting field?
b) land speed record
d) drag racing
Answer: b). A little known fact is that Tonya set a World Land
Speed record of 97.177 mph (156.391 km/h) in the Vintage Gas
Coupe class at Bonneville in August 2009 racing in a friend's
car, a 1931 Model A Ford named Lickety-Split.
25) Who is the first U.S. Ladies skating champion to be born A.W.
a) Mirai Nagasu
b) Ashley Wagner
c) Rachael Flatt
d) Gracie Gold
Answer: d). Born August 17, 1995, Gracie is the first U.S.
Ladies' champion to be born post-whacking.
Extra bonus questions:
Q: Portland writer Sarah Marshall is working on a book which
includes chapters on both Tonya and 1970's porn star Linda
Lovelace. What else does Tonya have in common with Linda Lovelace
(apart from the obvious)?
A: Both have been portrayed by actress Tina Yothers (best
remembered as the little blonde kid in the '80's sitcom "Family
Ties") - Tonya in "Spunk: the Tonya Harding Story" and Lovelace
in the stage production "Lovelace: The Musical".
Q: Tonya at one stage skated to a program that included Z.Z.
Top's "Sleeping Bag". What other connection is there between
"Sleeping Bag" and Tonya?
A: The song's music video features Nightmare on Elm Street's
Heather Langenkamp, who also played Nancy in the TV movie "Tonya
& Nancy, the Inside Story".
0-7: You could probably get a job writing for the Oregonian.
8-14: You have serious work to do to get up to speed on our ice
queen. I suggest you study our site, particularly back
issues of "The Portlandian" and "The Skater", and the
15-20: Pretty good, but there's always room to improve.
21-24: You'll be first in line for a Doctorate in Tonyaology when
Oregon universities start adding it to their curriculum.
25 + the bonus questions: You're Christine Brennan, aren't you?
VISIT THESE GREAT TONYA WEB SITES:
PortIce - http://www.pdxiss.org
David House - http://www.tonyaharding.org
Charlie Main - http://www.charliesweb.com/tonya/tonya.html
Puppetboy - http://www.usapaul.net/tonya/
Valerie Smith - http://www.olywa.net/radu/valerie/LilHam.html
Swan Lake - http://members.tripod.com/~TonyaHarding/index.html
Blades of Gold - http://members.tripod.com/tmhfan/index.html
Back to Portlandian index
Back to PortIce Home Page