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The Portlandian, the Internet's premier source of Tonya News
May 1, 1998 Edition - MAY DAY: TONYAPHILES OF THE WORLD UNITE!
(C) 1998 Portland Ice Skating Society
http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190
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PHASE TWO NOW UP
After a long delay, Phase Two of our Website is now up and
running. It consists of a series of essays that give a biography
of Tonya's early life, The Plot, an analysis of the evidence
against Tonya and expose the true reason why people REALLY
dislike her so much.
Most important of all is a page of resources of movers and
shakers in the skating world that you can write to to lobby for
Tonya's return to skating. And we aren't going to stop there! We
hope to soon have a t-shirt design that you can download
(completely free of charge) and print and wear to the rink to
show your support for Tonya!
You may also notice that we are now posting to the newsgroups
from a Deja News account. This is because DejaNews claim to offer
better spam filtration than Hotmail, but it's just an experiment
at this stage and we can still be reached at the Hotmail account
that we previously used, or via the form at our Website.
TONYA'S MANAGERS SEND MESSAGE OF SUPPORT
We're also very pleased to have also received a message from
Tonya's managers, Greg and Linda Lewis:
"On behalf of Tonya, I send thanks for your very kind words of
support for her. I need to tell you that there is no official
fan club for Tonya, we are only selling autographed pictures
of her through the websites. But thank you again for all of
your support for Tonya.
Sincerely,
Linda Lewis
Publicist and manager for Tonya Harding"
YET ANOTHER TONYA WEB SITE APPEARS
Since our Olympic specials, Tonyaphiles will be pleased to learn
that Greg and Linda have also now named Roy Edward's site (which
was formerly operated by Jim Maxey) as the Official Tonya site.
But this is not all; another Tonya site has also sprung up in the
interim. Located at:
http://members.tripod.com/~TonyaHarding/index.html
Swan Lake - the most recent arrival, is run by Brittany Conley.
It doesn't have much at present but looks like it will show a
great deal of promise, especially with a bit of encouragement. We
recommend that you go and check it out.
David House has also now added some Tonya movies to his site.
You'll need a Quicktime player to view them. One place that you
can download one from is:
http://browse.throbnet.com/paid/util/util.htm
(Throbnet, by the way, is actually a porn site located in Tonya's
own home town of Portland. But they do provide free movie viewers
that anybody can download, whether a subscriber or not! So, in a
way, Portland is still supporting Tonya!)
A CHANCE TO GET STONED
Fox, the network that brought you "Breaking the Ice", will soon
screen another item that will be of interest to Tonyaphiles. An
interview with Jeff Stone, or as we Tonyaphiles call him, The
Asshole Formerly Known As Gillooly, will screen as a segment of
"Lie Detector", a special to be shown on Fox on May 5 at 9pm
Eastern time. As part of the interview, O.J. prosecutor Marcia
Clark will also conduct a polygraph test on Gillooly which will
supposedly prove his claims that Tonya was involved in the plot
to whack another skater. Gillooly claims that he wants to "clear
his conscience" over his involvement in the kneewhacking affair.
Will the lie detector results clear Tonya, or will they just
prove that a practised liar can bamboozle a machine? Tune in and
see. Perhaps for an encore he could change his name again; we
suggest he try calling himself Pasha Stone this time - that way
people won't confuse him with that criminal Jeff Stone.
Clark, by the way, is not the only O.J. connection the show has;
it's based on a syndicated series that was hosted by O.J defense
lawyer F. Lee Bailey back in 1983. And also featured in the
special will be another O.J. regular, racist copper Mark Vermin -
oops, I mean Fuhrman, trying to put to rest rumors he planted
evidence. But Clark won't be interviewing him. No doubt he
figured once was quite enough!
THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE?
Some of you may recall us mentioning a book several months ago
called "The Black Stone", a novel which features as one of its
premises the idea that Tonya is in fact the reincarnation of Lee
Harvey Oswald! Well, the author, Robert Urbanek, has contacted us
and yes, you guessed it, there's now a Web site that you can
check out at:
http://members.aol.com/urbanekr/index.htm
You can order the book directly from the author or from
Amazon.com. Note that we haven't read it, so we have no idea if
it's any good. I wonder whether Urbanek is aware that both
Derrick Smith and Shawn Eckardt claim that they once worked for
an outfit in Switzerland called Blackstone?
AND SPEAKING OF SYMBOLISM...
While on the topic of symbolism, it's worth noting that there
apparently is a quiet suburb on the east coast of the United
States where two streets, Harding Road and Kerrigan Avenue,
prophetically intersect. The neighborhood has been around long
before the now legendary incident that forever entwined the two
skaters in history.
And how about a few anagrams? Some of these appeared in
alt.anagrams recently:
NANCY KERRIGAN = grace 'n any rink
ace rink granny
TONYA HARDING = do an angry hit
I had to, granny!
grand hit on ya
We certainly hope the Tonya ones aren't TOO symbolic!
GLORY DAYS
Speaking of books, much beloved skating commentator Christine
Brennan has recently released a sequel to her smash hit "Inside
Edge". Called "Edge of Glory", it apparently features a bit of an
update on Tonya, though whether there's much that you haven't
read here is unlikely. Already it's got skating fans upset over
comments about Tara Lipinski.
PORTLAND RADIO STATION PULLS STUNT
In our last issue we told you about how a blow-up doll shaped
like Tonya was thrown onto the ice after the pairs skating in
Nagano. It has now been revealed that this was actually a
publicity stunt pulled by two radio announcers from Portland's
Z100 radio station. Dan Clark and John Murphy from Z100's
"morning zoo" tossed the doll into the "kiss and cry" area after
Igor Marchenco and Evgenia Filonenko completed their skate. Tonya
was not amused. "To take away from the Olympics like that ...
it's just atrocious," Harding told the "Oregonian". "It's very,
very childish. Somebody ought to put a leash on them."
Z100 also has a "Tonya shrine" that you can visit at:
http://www.z100portland.com/nagano/shrine.html
I FOUGHT THE LAW AND THE LAW LOST
Has your boss been getting up your nose lately? Fancy beating the
crap out of him? Well, according to Fordham Law School Dean John
Feerick, it's no big deal if you do. At least, not if you're a
top NBA player, that is. You see, they apparently are exempt from
the same standards of dignified (not to mention law-abiding)
behavior that other people are expected to adhered to, especially
if they happened to be named Tonya Harding.
In case you haven't guessed it, the Latrell Sprewell decision is
now out. And, it goes without saying that predictable as
clockwork, the adjudicator, Professor Feerick, has largely sided
with Sprewell, saying that the decision to terminate Sprewell's
three year contract over the minor fact he tried to strangle his
coach was "unfair". This was despite there being 23 witnesses who
saw Sprewell's actions! Sprewell's suspension will end on July 1,
and although it will mean he won't play ball again this season,
it will save him from losing $17.5 million of his $24 million
contract.
Professor Feerick's decision doesn't cut much ice with the
public, however: an MSNBC poll on the issue had collected 8691
responses when we checked in, and 87% of respondents thought
justice had not been served by the arbitrator's decision. But one
wonders how many of those figure skaters who refuse to skate with
Tonya will be watching Sprewell play basketball?
Oh, and by the way, we don't REALLY suggest you beat up your
boss. At least not unless, like Sprewell, you've got Johnnie
Cochran as your lawyer...
NEW VIDEO SOURCE
Really MUST insist on seeing the so-called "Wedding Night video"?
Try E-bay online auctions at http://www.ebay.com. When we checked
for Tonya stuff there they had about half a dozen copies for
sale, though the prices varied. Often it now comes bundled with a
similar attempt by Pamela Anderson. Another outfit, R-Cards
International, also put out a 9 card trading card set with stills
from the tape in 1996. It's also not totally impossible that REAL
Tonya collectibles might turn up for sale, so it's worth keeping
an eye on.
PLASMATICS ON ICE?
Here at PortIce we tend to like listening to the great classics;
Zeppelin, Hendrix, the Pistols, the Stones, and of course Abba.
Which is why it is with great sadness that we learned of the
death early last month of punk priestess Wendy O. Williams. This
gives us a superb idea for Tonya's next program: perhaps she
could skate to a Plasmatics tune and blow up a Cadillac on the
ice at the end?
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VISIT THESE GREAT TONYA WEB SITES:
PortIce - http://www.geocities.com/Colosseum/Stadium/1190
Roy Edwards (formerly Jim Maxey) - http://www.tonyaharding.com
Dave House - http://www.davidhouse.com/tonya/index.html
Puppetboy - http://pages.ripco.com:8080/~deadboy/mirrortony2.html
Valerie Smith - http://www.olywa.net/radu/valerie/LilHam.html
Swan Lake - http://members.tripod.com/~TonyaHarding/index.html
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