T   H   H  E
  T   H   H  E
  T   H   H  EEEEE

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P   P O    O R   R   T   L      A A  NN  N D   D I  A A  NN  N
PPPP  O    O RRRR    T   L     AAAAA N N N D   D I AAAAA N N N
P     O    O R   R   T   L     A   A N  NN D   D I A   A N  NN
P      OOOO  R   R   T   LLLLL A   A N   N DDDD  I A   A N   N

The Portlandian, the Internet's premier source of Tonya News

August 19, 1999 Edition
(C) 1999 Portland Ice Skating Society

Last month's issue caused quite a stir, even more so than the one 
several months ago when we reported on Joe Haran's speech to the 
Portland Humanist association. But then, stirring goes with the 
territory when you're a Tonya supporter.


The demise of the official Tonya web site last month left a bit 
of a hole in the Tonya web scene. Fortunately it has been quickly
filled by one that is far superior: "Blades of Gold", located at

is run by Kim White and Stacey Howe. Kim was an original fan club 
member back in 1994 and has met Tonya in person three times - 
which in other words means she's a staunch Tonyaphile in for the 
long haul, unlike a certain porn merchant in Portland. It's good 
to see a site run by someone who has actually met Tonya and who 
can give a personal perspective. It also features some short 
clips from some of the songs written by Greg & Linda Lewis for 
Tonya that you can download and listen to, plus a couple of 
pictures that have probably not been seen anywhere else. We 
welcome Kim and Stacey to the on-line Tonya community and wish 
them all the best in their attempts to develop their site.


Some months ago we reported on an outfit in Norway called 
"Eventyrplassen Vannførelag" and how they had elected Tonya as 
patron of their organization. Unfortunately, for non-Norwegian 
speakers it was rather hard to figure out what their site was 
about. Now they've published a letter - in English - that removes 
the mystery. You can read it at:

Their name literally stands for "Adventure Square Water Supply 
Team" (it apparently makes more sense in its Norwegian 
equivalent) and they're a community service group in Oslo that 
organizes events for their neighborhood, including barbeques, 
singing, a banquet and games for the local children. The 
highlight is in winter when they turn on the firehoses and turn 
the square into an ice rink.

It's refreshing to see that in today's overworked and stressed-
out times such concern for the local community still exists in 
some places. And it's further proof that in spite of recent 
events there are many decent, honest Tonya supporters out there, 
and that the John Hinkley-type whacked-out weirdoes are only a 
tiny minority.


The collapse of the Maxey web site has had several consequences: 
Firstly we have been informed that Tonya has decided not to have 
any type of official site at present. And secondly, it raises the 
question of where to leave messages for Tonya.

Fortunately the Special Duties Section has been hard at work 
coming up with a solution. We've constructed our own message 
board where you can leave messages instead, and these will be 
passed on to Tonya at regular intervals. We've already put up 
some of the ones we've collected over the past few months. And 
just so that nobody can say it's just a load of Tonyaphile 
propaganda we'll even allow consider anti-Tonya messages for 
publication provided they're reasonably intelligent and not just 
crude or abusive. 

Several of the other sites listed at the bottom of this issue 
also have places to leave messages as well, and we know Tonya is 
aware of these.


During our time on the Net we've come across some pretty strange 
items inspired by the infamous 1994 knee-clubbing incident, 
ranging from fake stamps to tee-shirts. But without doubt the 
weirdest Tonya-Nancy collectable we've ever seen was featured on 
E-bay recently. These two carvings by artist Denzil Goodpaster 
were recently auctioned and can be viewed at our site.

The highest bid when we looked a few hours before closing was 
around $21, but it had failed to reach reserve. Which means it 
may well come up for sale a second time if anyone wants to own 
this unique memento of one of the key moments of skating 


One of the chief bugbears for Tonyaphiles outside of North 
America is the annoying differences in TV technical standards 
throughout the world and the problems that can cause when playing 
videotapes from other countries. This is particularly so for fans 
in places like Europe or the South Pacific where the German PAL 
TV system is used instead of the U.S. NTSC system that 
unfortunately most Tonya tapes are recorded in. The results are 
conversion hassles or the costs of shelling out for a new VCR.

Thankfully, a solution has now materialized:

is a skate tape trading site specifically dedicated to trading 
tapes recorded in the PAL system. Already there's a handful of 
Tonya recordings listed, including some from Lillehammer, so if 
you've got some PAL skating tapes to trade, check it out. 

And in case you're wondering, "Tonya and Jeff's Wedding Night" is 
NOT included in the list...


In our last issue we reported how "Roy Edwards", the guy who ran 
the now defunct official Tonya site, was in fact really Jim 
Maxey, one of America's most notorious cyberporn dealers.

It goes without saying that Maxey hasn't been too pleased with us 
shattering the carefully constructed facade of respectability 
he's been hiding behind all these months. He's obviously really 
spewing over the fact that a bunch of people from some obscure 
country he's probably never even heard of have managed to blow 
the lid off his sleazy little operation. But hey, that's the 
Internet - location doesn't matter any more.

Naturally, he's hit back, this time under his new alias of "Brian 
Bayard", posting lies and pornography about Tonya and ourselves. 
In his latest feeble effort he's reposted the Wedding Night 
shots, and two new photos that he claims are of Terry Hall, one 
of which is quite obscene. Although disappointing, this is hardly 
surprising; Maxey is after all just a one trick pony and it's 
obvious that posting dirty pictures is all he's good at. In fact, 
I'll bet that the real reason he canned the Tonya site was 
because he couldn't cut it running a proper straight site and had 
to go back to porn, the same as he failed at running an astronomy 
bulletin board and had to turn to porn to make a profit back in 
the '80's.

While as we have no intention getting into a battle of wits with 
an unarmed opponent, there are a number of things we do need to 
clarify. Firstly, "Brian Bayard" claims he doesn't know "Roy 
Edwards" and has never heard of Jim Maxey, yet he seems to be 
awfully upset by our comments about them in our last issue. A bit 
odd that "Brian" should be so passionate about comments made 
about a couple of complete strangers. Maybe that's because there 
is no "Brian" at all... 

"Brian" also claims that this is all part of some conspiracy to 
obtain the domain name, because we have none of our own. But he 
also claims that Terry is the same person as David House, someone 
who quite clearly DOES own a domain name (two of them, in fact). 
Can't you even get your own loony theories straight, Jim? 

Thirdly, Greg and Linda Lewis certainly don't sponge off Tonya. 
In fact, they run their own very successful music publishing and 
recording business. You can see for yourself at:

Unlike Jim Maxey, the Lewises CAN run a real website and make a 
living selling something honest. And they've been a great help to 
Tonya and have stood by her since the days of Elaine Stamm's 
original fan club way back before the Whacking. That's more than 
Maxey, who threw childish tantrums and threatened to shut down 
his web site every time Tonya didn't kiss his ass.

Finally, the two photos he claims are of "Terry" aren't even of 
the same guy! This is clearly the work of someone a few beers 
short of a six pack.

Well, we've got some photos of our own to show you. Don't worry, 
these are quite G-rated. Unlike Jim "Boogie Nights" Maxey, we 
don't have to resort to filth to win an argument. The first is a 
photo of the real Terry Hall, the one who operates the Special 
Duties Section here at PortIce. It's at:

Our apologies for the poor quality, but Terry doesn't like having 
his picture taken so this was the only one we could find. As you 
can see he's a pretty bad looking mother, so I really don't think 
that it would be wise to mess with him, if you get my meaning.

The second is a photo of Jim Maxey. And the third is one of the 
guy who calls himself "Roy Edwards". If you draw a moustache on 
"Roy", the resemblance to "Jim" is startling...

By the way, we wonder if Jim is still driving a Lexus? Or perhaps 
he's taken our suggestion and bought himself a REAL American 
pimpmobile like a Caddy or a Lincoln Town Car instead of a 
Japanese imitation.


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